11. Sourire

Sad again. I don't know for sure but I think I'm in love with l. It's just well, when I find my mind wondering it always stops with l. And he's SO cute. He has the most adorable way of explaining everything with that charming little smile. All I want is to see him, I don't care what he's doing, it's the sight of him that makes me happy. Is it still friendship? Does he feel the same way? I could only agonise over and over and over...

Today, when z, b, e and I went to sit on the stairs z saw him and called his name, asked him what the score was, in the test. He went over to talk. I found him looking at z and stealing little glances in my direcrion once in a while. The one thing I hate about z is that she makes herself look so friendly and funny in front of everyone. She's the type of girl that always ends up with people liking her more than me, every friend I ever had always liked her more. I don't want it to be the same with l. l is more than a friend, he can make me smile, he can make me cry, I remeber every little word he said. l started explaining something to z and we listened. Every now and then e and b would laugh and I would force myself to smile.

Not the first time I experienced envy, just the most painful one.

I just felt so special, knowing him, all with our little jokes and I feel like this has been stolen from me, somehow, by z. Suddenly, I don't ever want to see her again.

There are so many things I haven't told l and wish to still tell him. I want to see him before I go away. Is there a way?

fugueur

I was feeling sad
Can't help looking back
Highways flew by
Run, run, run away
No sense of time
Want you to stay
Want keep you inside

Run, run, run away
Lost, lost, lost my mind
Want you to stay
Want you to be my prize

Run, run, run away
Lost, lost, lost my mind
Want you to stay
Want you to be my prize

I was feeling sad
Can't help looking back
Highways flew by
Run, run, run away
No sense of time
Want you to stay
Want keep you inside

All along, not so strong without these open arms.
Hold on tight.
All along, not that strong without these open arms.
Lie beside.
All along, not so strong without these open arms.
Ride beside.

Run, run, run away
Lost, lost, lost my mind
Want you to stay
Want you to be my prize

Run, run, run away
Lost, lost, lost my mind
Want you to stay

Want you to be my prize